“Accordingly, happiness lies always in the future, or else in the past, and the present may be compared to a small dark cloud driven by the wind over the sunny plain; in front of and behind the cloud everything is bright, only it itself always casts a shadow.” Arthur Schopenhauer
Have you ever thought this way: ‘Once I have/ I’ll be …. I’ll be happy’ it’s a TRAP. You will always have a new goal, and it’ll be the path to happiness. This brings you to a position where happiness is deferred to some future event. but certainly, happiness is not now.
Happiness is found in the journey, not the destination
Let’s fix this. (it’s not easy, it needs some training)
Know Yourself
We are complex organisms and emotions often feel like a busy train station, there is noise, lack of clarity, things happen, trains are delayed and you don’t get the full picture of what is happening.
Stop. Sit down. Breathe in, out.
Ask yourself questions and be honest in your answers: keep going downhill. Why? Ask again, answer and doubt the answers. Why? You have to get to the bottom of your beliefs, and your needs, you will find things you didn’t know were there. And that is fine.
Some examples of questions that will take you on a nice journey within yourself:
- What do I value most (money, power, relationships,…)?
- Who are the most important people in my life and why?
- I want to give up something in my life, what and why?
- What do I want to achieve?
- If I had everything I want now, would I be happy?
Master Gratitude
Now that you know yourselves better, it is time for gratitude. There are many studies (and I invite you to look them up) that demonstrate the power of gratitude.
Gratitude shifts our focus from future goals to the present. Gratitude allows us to see the world around us differently.
What should I be grateful for? For everything, because you are living and your life is unique.
Try writing down three things every day that you are grateful for. Be consistent, I promise you that after one week you will already see differences.
Conclusion
I am the first to struggle with this problem, I have always lived in the future, to the detriment of the present, but I am getting better. I wrote this article to remind myself what to do and to share with others what has worked for me.